The Little Things
by Ayai
Summary: Karkat and Terezi aren't having an easy go at marriage, but they are trying to make things better through adoption. Of an animal, that is. Humanstuck


"They're staring at me."

"No they aren't."

"Yes they are. It's like I just fucking transformed into Romney's saggy, unwanted, left—"

A sharp pain ran its way up Karkat's leg, his brain quickly registering it and urging him to collapse his leg to take the strain off the bruise that was sure to be forming. His brain also was warning him not to because the outcome of him moving so fast in his current situation could very easily turn out badly.

Instead he just rolled his weight to his right leg, glaring daggers at the small female in front of him, as if it really mattered, "Did you just kick me?"

Piercing eyes in the shape of almonds narrowed at him, "There are children around! Watch your mouth." She demanded, her voice steady, almost begging for him to challenge her. She lightly put her foot back on the ground, shifting uncomfortably, as she had confided in Karkat earlier that all this walking was killing her already aching feet.

"Why should I? It's not like they don't hear it every day!" Karkat rolled his eyes. Oh my god the little assholes _were_ staring at him!

"We don't need to promote swearing, Karkat! If the youth decides they can just replace an educated word with 'fuck' or 'shit', we're going to have a lot more idiots running around, and we really don't need any more."

Terezi Pyrope-Vantas huffed, the corners of her lips turned down slightly, the knowledge that in the future the world would be run by this generation drove her insane, though she was slightly excited that all these people who walked around without a thought in their brain would end up giving her more work.

More idiots equaled more dead people in this crazy little Japanese girl's mind, and nothing made an afternoon better then slaving away at a crime scene, able to point out little details that no one else could see. Her gift baffled the other agents, and she was quickly known as the best investigator in the city. Her coworkers jokingly refer to her as this generation's Sherlock.

She had never admitted that she wanted more people dead, of course. But it was a fact that was pretty well known to Karkat and the rest of the couple's "friends".

"Well, I'm going to do whatever the hell I wan—_fuck_!" Karkat screeched, flinching away from the area where he received the pain. This time, however, it wasn't Terezi's foot injuring him, but the large colorful bird on his shoulder digging it's talons into his shoulder.

Karkat's sudden movements startled the Macaw and in an attempt to balance himself, he dug his talons in deeper and began to flag his wings, succeeding in giving Karkat a mouthful of multicolored feathers.

Terezi began whacking him in the sides with her sharp elbow, "Stop moving! You're scaring him!"

The trio was quick to grab the attention of everyone on their side of the pet store, as it was not every day you see a tall, pale, angry looking man having a fit with a parrot appearing to be attacking him while a short girl assaulted him. Eventually, they managed to capture the attention of their designated employee, who hesitantly approached them, being careful to avoid the flailing limbs, large wings, and bags that were threatening to trip her if she got too close, "Ah… Do you two need any," she paused, testing the words, "assistance?"

Almost immediately, Terezi ceased her mindless jabbing, returning her elbow and shopping bags to their rightful place. The Macaw also released its death grip on Karkat, relaxing and tucking his wings back in, his head flicking around curiously, watching the passing shoppers who had been staring at the group before, and were now wearily trying to get around them before another episode could begin.

Terezi's and the bird's reactions left Karkat confused and angry. It was as if they were on the same wavelength; comfortable with going bat shit crazy with Karkat but when addressed they went back to being professionals. Great, two Terezi's within a three foot radius. It was a miracle in itself the world hadn't imploded yet.

"Yes, actually. We'll take this colorful critter." Terezi smiled at the employee, motioning to the innocent appearing Macaw.

The young lady's eyebrows furrowed, possibly wondering if it was a good idea to sell to this pair of individuals. She slowly nodded though, stepping back a few steps, "Alright, I'll go get you a travel cage… One moment, please.

Karkat sighed, taking his eyes off the retreating employee and turning to his wife. Or rather, where his wife SHOULD have been. A quick glance proved that instead of staying put, Terezi decided to wander off and explore the aisles.

"Jesus fucking Christ." He muttered, reluctantly and carefully following her, treading lightly as to not jostle the bird still on his shoulder too much.

The aisles were predictably crowded, as the pet store had been promoting today's big sale for weeks. Pet owners from all over the city flocked to the store because they were expecting prices to drop dramatically, only to find that the most off you could get on an item was 10%, the cheap bastards. The staff had decorated the whole store in Christmas colors. Red and green streamers hung from the ceiling and rested on the ground from where dumbass teenagers ripped them down.

Wading through the masses with a parrot on your shoulder turned out to not be a really easy task. Karkat risked having the sharp talons rip into his skin if he accidentally hit his shoulder on something or didn't move out of the way fast enough.

Terezi was lucky, she was short enough to just bob and weave her way through the crowd and be out of it in less than a minute. From the direction she had disappeared in, Karkat could assume that she was heading toward the section where the SPCA had set up their stands for the weekend, trying to adopt out every dog they had with them. Her obsession with cute furry things was probably about to put her husband in a pinch.

Sure enough, after Karkat made it out of the aisle, Terezi was crouched in front of a foldable table that held cages full of cats and kittens, being assaulted by a number of dogs. Sighing, he approached her, the Macaw growing excited, seeing his fellow troublemaker, spread his wings about and began smacking Karkat in the face once again and bobbing his head. Thankfully before Karkat threw the damn bird off his shoulder the employee from before removed it from his shoulder, swiftly transferring him from her arm into the travel cage.

A few words were exchanged between the two, the girl giving Karkat a starter kit for new bird owners and Karkat apologizing for his wife's ADHD. When she had left, he set the bird cage down next to Terezi and crouched down beside her. Her face was contorted with glee as she tried to pet each puppy that was forcing its way into her lap.

She looked at him with a big smile on her face. Karkat realized this was the first time in a while she had smiled at _him_, and he felt a pang in his heart.

Their marriage wasn't in shambles just yet, but he could easily see it becoming that way if they didn't sort out their differences soon. The two had been drifting apart ever since they got married, their different views clashing, each one of them too headstrong to give into the others wishes.

Karkat really didn't want to be one of those couples that couldn't survive the first year, but he also _refused_ to back down. Things had been going just fine, but no, Terezi wanted to change everything when it'd been almost perfect before.

He still loved her of course, but they were both sick of the fighting.

"I want it."

Karkat frowned, "Want what? A new T.V? Fuck, me too. Let's just leave and go next door to Wal-Mart—"

"No, Karkat. I want _this_." To Karkat's dismay, she raised a puppy out of the mix. "This one." She emphasized.

She shoved the puppy in his face, their noses almost touching. Karkat cringed and leaned back. The dog and Terezi's expressions matched perfectly, each one staring at Karkat intently with hope in their eyes.

"Dammit Terezi, we're already getting this pecking beast—" He trailed off as Terezi stuck out her bottom lip.

Saying no to her was always hard when she did this kind of shit. She would open her eyes as wide as she could, knowing Karkat was weak to them. All sorts of colors were laced into them, so much so that he was unsure what color they were mostly, though he'd probably say if asked blue or green.

"No."

Well, that was actually surprisingly easy.

Terezi frowned, bringing the puppy that was roughly the size of a Jack Russell back to her chest.

"Well I'm getting her anyways." She stated, lifting herself and the puppy off the ground and walking to the adoption desk, leaving Karkat alone, save for the cackling bird and barking dogs.

* * *

New story. I have like 10 ongoing, but I hope that I actually finish this one.

This story is going to accurately display the human race, so be prepared if you read this because not everything will be sugarcoated.

Here's my tumblr if you want to follow it because I'll put updates on there first.

reilias . tumblr. com

K bye.


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